Loss and grief

Everyone knows that with life, there is death. The moment of conception, life begins, and at any time can be met with death. It's sad to think about, and can cause a lot of grief.

Why do people think that when a life is lost that people can just cry and be over it? Some people can do that, but for some of us, its not as easy. I've lost a few people that I was very close to, and a baby. It's not something I can just cry over it for a day and bounce back and never have emotion for it again. Do I cry everyday about it, no, but I have my days when it effects me more than others.

There are many days I think of my friend Amanda, and cry. She died 8 years ago, but I still think about her and shed tears for her. I still think of my grandmother. She died 5 years ago, but I still think about and shed tears for her. I lost my baby less than a year ago, so I definitely still think about and cry for my child.

This doesn't mean I am weak, it means that I had very strong feelings for them and still feel sadness that they are not here with me. The day that I think of them without sadness is the day I have forgotten who they were to me and what they meant in my life. This isn't saying that all people feel this way, or because they feel differently means they have forgotten, thats just how it is for me.

I hope that people understand that crying and feeling pain isn't something some us choose to feel, it just is. People really should try harder to understand that and be more sympathetic to people who have a harder time with their losses. Telling someone to get over it isn't being either, and actually is a bit harsh. Something as simple as saying "I am sorry, hope you feel better soon" can be enough, or just say nothing at all. Sometimes nothing at all is better.