My journey to God

As a beginner on this journey, I am finding it hard to make changes in my life. I am trying, though probably not as hard as I should. I know that I need to make a lot of changes, but I have started very small and will try to build on that.

On of my friends wrote about learning to play pool and all the required changes it takes to get from a casual player to a tournament player. She compared this to what it's like turning your life to the Lord. There are so many things you have to learn, though because there are so many required changes, it's best to learn a couple small things and then keep building from there.

Right now, my focus is on reading the Bible, listing to and watching a pod cast from a church in GA, and just trying to find the deepest faith. Because of this, there have been changes in me already. Things I know I need to change, and things I am willing to change to make myself better in God's eyes.

I have begun to pray again. I have made the choice to quit drinking. I have tried to be more attentive to my husband and children. I have begun to feel peace within myself again. These are major changes in just a couple weeks, but just some of the things that simply come from believing in Christ.

I know that it's going to take a lot of other changes to really get myself "right", but I know that in order to be the best person I can be, I need to make those changes. I know I won't change over night, and that's okay, its a process. I have been this way for so long, its hard to change. I will just keep praying for the courage to make those changes and the strength to keep with it.

I am going to need strength, because I know this isn't going to be an easy process. Not only am I going to have to make major changes to my life, I am going to have to really review and evaluate myself and the things that I should be doing that I am not, and the things I shouldn't be doing that I am. I don't know about you, but sometimes its hard to think about it and know that you were wrong.

With that said, I will also pray for perseverance to not allow my fears to get in my way. This is something that I really want and need, so I can't let my fears keep me from doing it.

In about 2 weeks, I will be leaving and heading back to the US for a bit. Along the way, I will be stopping in GA to see someone I have known almost my whole life and who turned me onto the church I listen to on podcast. I will be attending a service with her, and I am extremely excited about it! After watching and listening online, and being so moved by it all, I can only imagine what its going to feel like in person! I can't wait!!! I will let you all know how it goes!