Military Friendship

Growing up, I was basically surrounded by the same people. I made new friends, but kept a lot of my friends throughout the years. Not saying that all of those friends are still friends of mine today, but for many years I stayed surrounded by the same people. Though, just as with anything else, there is good and bad to having the same group of friends for so long.

With military life, it's exactly the opposite. You make friends for short periods of time and then one of you has to leave. While you may keep in touch, friendships generally fizzle out after not being with each other for so long. It's tough, and there is good and bad to it.

Having been surrounded by the same people most of my teenage years, I found that I got caught up in a lot of things that wouldn't happen now. I mainly hung with the "bad" crowd and did lots of partying and other not so great stuff. But, I had the same people around me all the time, whether they were real friends or not. It was just a comfort zone for me. Knowing who would partake in the parties and who I could be "bad" with was easy. The comfort zone is always nice, but being surrounded by people who weren't true friends and who used me was the downfall. They knew how far they could get and they'd push it to the limit every time. Most of those people haven't been part of my life for years, but the true friends are still around.

Now, I make friends just to say good-bye to them. Whether they leave or I leave, we may have gotten a couple of years or just a few months. It always stinks to say good-bye to the great people I meet. It's hard to do, and doesn't have many upsides, in my opinion. The only upside I see to it is that I get to meet many different kinds of people and will maybe keep in touch with a handful of them. I've made some amazing friendships, but even some of those have begun to fizzle out, those that I haven't seen in a while. I still keep in touch, and have 1 or 2 that I am still VERY close to, but it's just different.

There might be one other good thing about it. Even though (at least in my experience) there is a lot of drama among military spouses, I haven't really dealt with as much drama as I did with the people I had around me for so many years. Maybe I just don't put up with it as much, or maybe because time is so limited people generally don't waste it with drama. I am not really sure, I just know that I haven't had as much to deal with. Now, don't get me wrong, I've had my fair share of drama with other spouses. It happens, and with women, how could you not expect it? It's just not something that occurs every single day for me, where before, it seemed like every 5 minutes there was new drama among the group of people I associated with.

Pretty soon, in just a couple short weeks, I get to say bye to someone I have grown to admire and consider a good friend. She's been there when I needed help, been there just to hang out and my boys love her boys. It kinda stinks because I feel like we just started becoming friends and now she's leaving. BUT, in the same token, everyone has to move on and she isn't going to another planet. Surely we will keep in touch and hopefully run into each other again sometime down the road.

Whether in the military life or not, friendship is hard. Like any relationship, it takes work and love to blossom and stay alive. Hopefully I will continue to make great friendships and for those that stay part of my life forever, I will be grateful for them! I will be grateful for anyone, all friendships. Because especially with the fact that most are temporary, you truly have to appreciate those people and what they bring to your life, even for just a brief time!