Busy, busy, busy. That's been my weekend. I am finally getting a chance to sit down and do something other than get right back up or school work. Taking a vacation in my world means doing more than I do at home. Sound crazy? I might be, slightly.
I got to Florida on Friday when Jennifer's hubby drove me and the kids to Macon and my mom met us there to pick us up. The kids were so whinny on the trip, once we were with my mom. That made it seem like a longer trip that it was, though still not as bad as the flight over.
We got in around 3:30pm or so, and my best friend, Laura, came over to see us!!! She's such an awesome friend to be one of the first people to greet me!!! anywho... We played with the kids, had dinner, made some plans for her day off and then we did baths and went to bed.
Saturday, yesterday, we had to take mom's rental back and go to the store for some snacks and stuff for the kids. I also meant to get baby shampoo, so not to burn their eyes with regular shampoo, and forgot it. That made for an interesting bath time. We had an easy dinner, but bed time was frightful. They went to sleep fairly easily, though I moved them and Adrien woke up. Well, that was around 11pm, and he was awake until nearly 4am.
It wouldn't have been so bad if I didn't have plans for today, but I had a wedding to go to. Thankfully I still made it, but I am very exhausted, running on just 4 hours of sleep. When I got back, the kids wanted to eat so I had to get them dinner. They had dinner already, but I think because it was pretty early, they weren't quite ready to eat then.
After dinner, mom gave them a bath for me and got them ready for bed. I got them all tucked in, though it took Darien quite a while to fall asleep. Then, Adrien fell out of the chair he was asleep in and woke up. Fearing another episode like last night, I tried to leave him alone in hopes he would go back to sleep, after making sure he was okay. I walked outside and when I came back in, Grampy Bill (my mom's boyfriend) was holding him and just rocking him. He finally got him quiet and laid back down and out like a light.
In between all of this, I am trying to get a head start on my second class, which starts Tuesday. I want to make sure I stay on top of everything so I don't get behind. Visiting can get in the way at times, so if I am ahead, I have no excuses.
So, this is really the first time I have actually sat and been able to do more than quickly reply to someone or do more than class work. It's definitely a nice little break, though I will definitely be trying to make plenty of time for this while I am here. My family is awesome, though I need a break from them all once in a while.
I am hoping to get some really great pictures of the kids soon. Keeping checking back for updates on our visit and pictures of my great family and friends!
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Thursday, October 7, 2010
Guilt Trip
I have had tons of guilt trips in my life, even from my own kids, but the worst was tonight from a 4 year old who isn't even mine. Being here for the last 2 weeks has given the kids time to connect and get to love each other. They have played well, and had lots of fun together! I think McKenzie and Darien would grow up best friends if we lived close by.
They really have played so well together. They are like best friends after just two weeks. Darien doesn't say as much about the "girl friend" thing as he had with most other little girls, so I do think he feels much differently about her than he has any other friend he has had. It's so cute because you can tell he just loves her to death, but it's definitely different.
I think, if we lived near here, they'd be the two to grow up as best friends and never have that attraction to each other. It would be more like brother and sister and just be an awesome friendship for them. It does make me wish we could be closer, for them, and maybe someday we will be. I'd love for Darien to have that close of a friend and it be for life.
But tonight, when Jennifer was explaining to her that we had to leave tomorrow, she cried and cried. She doesn't understand why we can't stay forever and doesn't want us to leave. It was so sad and pitiful that I started to tear up. It's the kind of guilt trip that makes you want to stay just to make a little girl happy.
I really hope that we get the chance to come back soon. Maybe, if we get a base near by, we can take an extended weekend to visit. Though, I am going to try to do video calls and stuff with them so that the kids can stay in touch and hopefully stay friends even through the distance.
They really are just too darn cute together :)
They really have played so well together. They are like best friends after just two weeks. Darien doesn't say as much about the "girl friend" thing as he had with most other little girls, so I do think he feels much differently about her than he has any other friend he has had. It's so cute because you can tell he just loves her to death, but it's definitely different.
I think, if we lived near here, they'd be the two to grow up as best friends and never have that attraction to each other. It would be more like brother and sister and just be an awesome friendship for them. It does make me wish we could be closer, for them, and maybe someday we will be. I'd love for Darien to have that close of a friend and it be for life.
But tonight, when Jennifer was explaining to her that we had to leave tomorrow, she cried and cried. She doesn't understand why we can't stay forever and doesn't want us to leave. It was so sad and pitiful that I started to tear up. It's the kind of guilt trip that makes you want to stay just to make a little girl happy.
I really hope that we get the chance to come back soon. Maybe, if we get a base near by, we can take an extended weekend to visit. Though, I am going to try to do video calls and stuff with them so that the kids can stay in touch and hopefully stay friends even through the distance.
They really are just too darn cute together :)
Wednesday, October 6, 2010
I Appreciate Everything!
It's been so crazy the last couple weeks. Traveling from Germany to the US with 2 kids and no husband was CRAZY. Then coming and staying in GA with a friend and meeting a bunch of new people and keeping a pretty busy schedule. Four kids, church, lunches, dinners and other get gatherings. It's been a pretty crazy couple of weeks.
The people I have met here have been nothing less than amazing. It's so weird to finally be in a place where I feel completely accepted and loved no matter my past, issues or self image. People who can finally see past all my flaws and look deeper and see that there is more to me than I show on the surface. It's just a nice reminder that there are actually people who can accept me and will, even if it's been a while since I had met any.
Jennifer has been a wonderful host! Putting up with me and the boys, and I am sure stressing out a little with all four kids. We may have known each other for 23 years, but we weren't actually friends until just a couple weeks ago when she reached out to me. So, just that she had offered to help me by picking us up and allowing us to stay with her was nothing short of AWESOME! It's definitely been awesome getting to know her better and making a great friend in the process. I just hope I haven't stressed her out too badly.
The kids seem to have a good time together, with some fighting in between. Though, when you have 2 two-year olds and a 3 and 4 year old, they are bound to butt heads now and then. I think they have been under a lot of stress from the rapid change of scenery, and from other people seeming to have taken over their house. It's natural for kids to act out, and we are all hoping that everything calms once things go back to normal. Except, things aren't going to be normal for my kids for a while.
How can I really show my appreciation to Jennifer for being so kind and opening her house and life up to me and the boys? I've tried to at least help with housework and pay her back for some expenses, but I just don't feel like its been enough. I just hope that someday, in some way I can repay her for the amazing time I have had here.
Tomorrow should be a pretty busy day, though I am hoping to be able to help her get the house cleaned up and not leave a huge mess behind when we leave Friday morning. That's the one thing I do not like feeling, like I came, ate, slept and just left not caring what mess we are leaving behind. I owe it to her, and her whole family, to do that.
For now though, it's time for bed. Tomorrow we have Bible study, got to make some dip for CR, pack our stuff back up and get ready to head out bright and early Friday morning!
The people I have met here have been nothing less than amazing. It's so weird to finally be in a place where I feel completely accepted and loved no matter my past, issues or self image. People who can finally see past all my flaws and look deeper and see that there is more to me than I show on the surface. It's just a nice reminder that there are actually people who can accept me and will, even if it's been a while since I had met any.
Jennifer has been a wonderful host! Putting up with me and the boys, and I am sure stressing out a little with all four kids. We may have known each other for 23 years, but we weren't actually friends until just a couple weeks ago when she reached out to me. So, just that she had offered to help me by picking us up and allowing us to stay with her was nothing short of AWESOME! It's definitely been awesome getting to know her better and making a great friend in the process. I just hope I haven't stressed her out too badly.
The kids seem to have a good time together, with some fighting in between. Though, when you have 2 two-year olds and a 3 and 4 year old, they are bound to butt heads now and then. I think they have been under a lot of stress from the rapid change of scenery, and from other people seeming to have taken over their house. It's natural for kids to act out, and we are all hoping that everything calms once things go back to normal. Except, things aren't going to be normal for my kids for a while.
How can I really show my appreciation to Jennifer for being so kind and opening her house and life up to me and the boys? I've tried to at least help with housework and pay her back for some expenses, but I just don't feel like its been enough. I just hope that someday, in some way I can repay her for the amazing time I have had here.
Tomorrow should be a pretty busy day, though I am hoping to be able to help her get the house cleaned up and not leave a huge mess behind when we leave Friday morning. That's the one thing I do not like feeling, like I came, ate, slept and just left not caring what mess we are leaving behind. I owe it to her, and her whole family, to do that.
For now though, it's time for bed. Tomorrow we have Bible study, got to make some dip for CR, pack our stuff back up and get ready to head out bright and early Friday morning!
Sunday, October 3, 2010
Euphoria
Today is now going to mark another "birthday" for me! The one major difference between this day and my actual birthday is that I chose this day to be "reborn" through Christ. It was very emotional, in a happy way, and just an amazing day all around.
The week leading up, and even the weeks prior once I knew it was going to happen, I was excited and nervous. Yesterday and today my nerves were so on edge I just didn't know what to expect and even thought about changing my mind. Man, I am sure glad I didn't.
Of course, once we were at the church, the nerves just got worse. When I knew it was time to change, again, nerves got worse. When Pastor Scott said my name, the nerves again got worse. I remember clearly most of it, but at some point everything just went a little fuzzy and I couldn't tell you what was going on around me.
I climbed into the tub and sat down. Pastor Scott was talking and giving the background story of Jennifer and me to those watching. Then, he asked the 2 most important questions, and that's where it all went kinda fuzzy. I felt like I was going to cry. I was extremely emotional and nervous. Jennifer dunked me and it felt like everything was just going in SUPER SLOW motion, but in a good way. I got out of the tub and just about froze.
I remember that, but I don't remember anything I was doing. I just remember feeling like I was going to cry. Then, I saw the photos and saw something I definitely did not expect. I was smiling almost to the point of laughing. WOW. I really didn't think I was smiling, let alone that big of a smile.
I can't really explain the feeling that came over me when I was being baptized, other than it was a feeling of euphoria that I have never experienced before in my lifetime. It was like a sudden gush of pure pleasure and happiness with a cloud of calm just all around me. I heard absolutely no noise, everything seemed silent, even if only for a couple seconds. It felt a lot like being the only person in the room and God baptizing me himself. It was really something that just can't be put into words.
After, we got all the ladies in a photo that I have had the pleasure of meeting and sharing with while here, and the ladies that I feel will be a huge part of my new life. These women have not only reached out to me in a way that most people would never do, they have really been encouraging and amazing to me throughout this entire process. Just amazing people that I am definitely blessed to now have as friends!
This is definitely going to be a day I cherish for the rest of my life! I will celebrate this day with purpose! My life now belongs to Jesus and as long as I let him, he will continue to do amazing things in my life! Happy Birthday to me :)
The week leading up, and even the weeks prior once I knew it was going to happen, I was excited and nervous. Yesterday and today my nerves were so on edge I just didn't know what to expect and even thought about changing my mind. Man, I am sure glad I didn't.
Of course, once we were at the church, the nerves just got worse. When I knew it was time to change, again, nerves got worse. When Pastor Scott said my name, the nerves again got worse. I remember clearly most of it, but at some point everything just went a little fuzzy and I couldn't tell you what was going on around me.
I climbed into the tub and sat down. Pastor Scott was talking and giving the background story of Jennifer and me to those watching. Then, he asked the 2 most important questions, and that's where it all went kinda fuzzy. I felt like I was going to cry. I was extremely emotional and nervous. Jennifer dunked me and it felt like everything was just going in SUPER SLOW motion, but in a good way. I got out of the tub and just about froze.
I remember that, but I don't remember anything I was doing. I just remember feeling like I was going to cry. Then, I saw the photos and saw something I definitely did not expect. I was smiling almost to the point of laughing. WOW. I really didn't think I was smiling, let alone that big of a smile.
I can't really explain the feeling that came over me when I was being baptized, other than it was a feeling of euphoria that I have never experienced before in my lifetime. It was like a sudden gush of pure pleasure and happiness with a cloud of calm just all around me. I heard absolutely no noise, everything seemed silent, even if only for a couple seconds. It felt a lot like being the only person in the room and God baptizing me himself. It was really something that just can't be put into words.
After, we got all the ladies in a photo that I have had the pleasure of meeting and sharing with while here, and the ladies that I feel will be a huge part of my new life. These women have not only reached out to me in a way that most people would never do, they have really been encouraging and amazing to me throughout this entire process. Just amazing people that I am definitely blessed to now have as friends!
This is definitely going to be a day I cherish for the rest of my life! I will celebrate this day with purpose! My life now belongs to Jesus and as long as I let him, he will continue to do amazing things in my life! Happy Birthday to me :)
Friday, October 1, 2010
God's work?!
Have you ever had something happen that just feels like God speaking directly to you or answering a prayer very vividly? Ever since I decided to turn my life back over to Him, things just keep happening to make me believe he's just been waiting for me. It feels like he keeps giving me answers to prayers that I haven't even prayed in a long time. It also feels like he is giving me the peace of mind on some things to know that it isn't as bad as I believed it to be.
What is it that has been happening? Well, lots of stuff. The first and most important is that he sent me someone to remind me that he is here and wants a relationship with me. He sent her to me 23 years ago, and though I've known her all along, she has only recently become someone I can truly call a great friend!
Then, he answered the prayer of me wanting to come visit her and her church. After watching the podcasts from the church services, I thought that it would be awesome to see it in person. I was so moved by the things I was hearing, and just wondered if it would even be possible. Traveling from Germany to the US can get expensive, so it was a matter of if we could afford the trip. He answered that prayer by having this person offer to pick me up from where I could fly into on a SpaceA flight (cheap-free flights for military and their families when there is available space). That took a large financial burden off the trip right there. Then it was just a matter of how to get back and that was worked out by my mom coming to get me and going to FL to see family. How awesome!
Then, there is someone from my past that I hurt more than I have hurt anyone, EVER. My ex husband. I hadn't seen or heard from him since shortly after our divorce, but out of the blue he sent me a message. The message stated that he had been doing some sole searching and needed to let me know that he forgave me (which if you know the story, thats a HUGE deal) and wanted to let me know. That right there lifted a whole ton of bricks off my chest and gave me some peace with that.
I've had a couple of people just go out of there way to help me and really just be there for me through this whole process. It's amazing the people you can find when you look in the right places. I've had a lot of great people reach out to me, letting me know that there are people out there, whether they know me or not, that care about me and where I am headed. That just amazes me, especially after the experiences I have had with people in general. It's definitely given me a new look on people.
Then, out of the blue, a friend from my past, with whom I had an extremely explosive blow out with, sent me a message. At first I was very awkward about it and wasn't sure what to think or say. Though, after writing back and forth a bit, I realize that I should be more open to giving and receiving apologies. It's just so amazing that the opportunities are presenting themselves so soon.
With all these amazing things happening, I can't help but to believe that this is for real and that as long as I truly put my trust and faith in God, things will only continue to get better. I am so excited to see the other good things in store for my life!
What is it that has been happening? Well, lots of stuff. The first and most important is that he sent me someone to remind me that he is here and wants a relationship with me. He sent her to me 23 years ago, and though I've known her all along, she has only recently become someone I can truly call a great friend!
Then, he answered the prayer of me wanting to come visit her and her church. After watching the podcasts from the church services, I thought that it would be awesome to see it in person. I was so moved by the things I was hearing, and just wondered if it would even be possible. Traveling from Germany to the US can get expensive, so it was a matter of if we could afford the trip. He answered that prayer by having this person offer to pick me up from where I could fly into on a SpaceA flight (cheap-free flights for military and their families when there is available space). That took a large financial burden off the trip right there. Then it was just a matter of how to get back and that was worked out by my mom coming to get me and going to FL to see family. How awesome!
Then, there is someone from my past that I hurt more than I have hurt anyone, EVER. My ex husband. I hadn't seen or heard from him since shortly after our divorce, but out of the blue he sent me a message. The message stated that he had been doing some sole searching and needed to let me know that he forgave me (which if you know the story, thats a HUGE deal) and wanted to let me know. That right there lifted a whole ton of bricks off my chest and gave me some peace with that.
I've had a couple of people just go out of there way to help me and really just be there for me through this whole process. It's amazing the people you can find when you look in the right places. I've had a lot of great people reach out to me, letting me know that there are people out there, whether they know me or not, that care about me and where I am headed. That just amazes me, especially after the experiences I have had with people in general. It's definitely given me a new look on people.
Then, out of the blue, a friend from my past, with whom I had an extremely explosive blow out with, sent me a message. At first I was very awkward about it and wasn't sure what to think or say. Though, after writing back and forth a bit, I realize that I should be more open to giving and receiving apologies. It's just so amazing that the opportunities are presenting themselves so soon.
With all these amazing things happening, I can't help but to believe that this is for real and that as long as I truly put my trust and faith in God, things will only continue to get better. I am so excited to see the other good things in store for my life!
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