100th Post, beginning of 2012!!!

So, not only is this the first post of 2012, it's also my 100th post!!! This is mighty special! I've been trying to pick a good topic and haven't had much come to mind. So, I will just tell you all how I brought in the new year since I enjoyed the night!

Well, first, early in the evening I started to have pain in my lower back side, on my right side. Felt like someone stabbing me. After a short nap, it seemed to be better. So, I finished up the yummy food I was making and just about the time our friends came over, it was back. Not sure what it is but possibly a UTI or kidney stones. Either way, I refused to spend my new years in the ER. I took some meds and dealt with it and now I am feeling alright!

The day started off with my getting my beef stew cooking!!! YUMMY!!! I had 4lbs of stew beef I needed to use, so it made for a great meal! I also made some apple empanadas and sweet potatoes! Everything was delicious and well worth the day spent making it!

The stew

The empanadas

Our friends, Tigger and Tyler and their daughter Gracie, came to eat and bring in the new year with us! We ate, and stuffed our faces full!!! After watched some movies, some comedy shows and play a little Apples to Apples! Some may not call this a night to remember, but I sure will remember it! Bringing in the new year with great friends is always a great time!!!

Right at midnight we went outside to see what we could see of the fireworks, which wasn't much. I kissed my husband, now for the 6th new year spent together, and was even able to kiss Darien!!!

We took a couple pics and that was our night! I loved every moment of this quiet night at home with friends and family!!! While partying the new year in is what it's all about for some, having my family with me is the best way I can see bringing in the new year!

So, Happy New Years everyone!!! Wishing all lots of happiness and great things in 2012!

2012 WILL be GREAT!

I'm not normally one to make New Years resolutions because I NEVER stick to what I say. I normally make hard resolutions that are impossible to accomplish, therefor disappointing myself. Well, this year I am making some resolutions and I am making them easy enough to accomplish!

First, I am setting a goal of going somewhere I've never been, see something I've never seen and do something I've never done. Living in Europe makes this easy!!! There is so much to do and see and so many places to go, we just have to do it!!!

Second, I want to get back into college classes and not take a break between classes. Now, I am leaving some wiggle room with this for emergencies, but if nothing is going on, I want to take back to back classes and do well with it! I need to get the degree knocked out so that I can work when we are back in the US.

Third, I want to take my new business as far as I can. I am hoping to sign at least 10 Loyal Customers and recruit 2 people. I think I can definitely do this in 1 year. That gives me 12 months! If I can't do that, I am not trying hard enough.

Fourth, I want to lose weight and get healthy! I am not setting specific goals here because I may not be able to get to a certain number. I just want to have a body that I would be comfortable wearing a bikini! It really shouldn't be too awful hard, but it's going to be a lot of work!

Lastly, and most importantly, I want to work on being a better wife, mother, family member, friend and person overall! I'm flaky at times and when I am upset or having a bad day, I can tend to forget that other people have things going on too. But my real goal is to be the person that God intends me to be for all the people in my life!

What are your goals for 2012???

Probably shouldn't but do

I've had something on my mind and I want to get it out before the new year. I'm going to really try to make a change in my posts in 2012, posting only positive or motivational stuff. But for now, I need to get this out. I probably shouldn't have this on my mind, but unfortunately, I do.

I'm still friends with some of my exes. Well, probably with more than most people. But keep in mind, this is also including people I wasn't "exclusive" with. I am considering anyone I've had more than a platonic friendship with. And I am also going to be speaking about some that I am not friends with but know what's going in their life because we have mutual friends.

Some things I am just confused about. I know I am not God's gift to men or anything but seriously... I see the women these guys are with, or hear about how they are treated by these women and just don't understand it. I wasn't the greatest girl friend to some of them but there were a few who were treated pretty darn good. Now they are with women who degrade them, cheat on them and just treat them like total crap.

I know this doesn't reflect me or our relationship but it does make me wonder what was so wrong with me that I wasn't wanted more than I was. Did I try TOO hard? Was I not good in bed? Was I just plain dumb? What was it that they didn't like about me but keeps them with these women who are so horrible to them? It's kinda hard not to wonder these things. Especially when they could have had me so completely and chose someone who treated them poorly.

Though, I guess seeing all of this can make me more thankful I am where I am. My marriage isn't perfect but even with the imperfections my husband treats me pretty good. He has his moments when he can be a jerk, but all men do I guess. But 95% of the time he treats me really well.

Even though I have a really good life, it's hard not to question things like this. But I have to try to keep in mind that it must have all been God's plan to get me where I am now. With my husband and our 3 adorable boys! Now I just wish some of these guys would wake up and realize they deserve so much better than what they are allowing themselves.

Mistakes don't bring different outcomes

Ever heard the saying "If you keep doing what you've always done you will keep getting what you always got"? Or even "If you make the same mistake twice, the second time it wasn't a mistake it was a choice"? Well, seems lately these are statements I want to tell MANY people. People seem to do the same things over and over and some how believing the outcome will be better than the last time. I just don't understand it. And most times, they call them "mistakes" yet they continually do the same things.

I'm not perfect, not by any stretch of the imagination. I'm completely guilty of doing things over and over and expecting different outcomes. I've even made choices to make mistakes more than once, sometimes a handful of times, and still thinking the outcomes should have been different. Well, how can we expect the outcome to be different if we keep doing the same thing? Mistakes or not, people have got to change things in the life if they ever want to go anywhere different.

Cheating on your spouse is a mistake, the FIRST time. After that, you are making a choice to do that same mistake. If you don't want to keep making that mistake, change something. Change the company you keep, change the people you chat with online, change the places you go and change the way you talk to people. If it's something that happens with the influence of alcohol, QUIT drinking.

When your spouse finds out, no one is going to blame them for treating you like crap. And when it's happened more than once, they will eventually get to a point of leaving. Don't get upset with them, they've stuck around for your antics, be mad at yourself because you CHOSE to make those mistakes over and over and they finally CHOSE to not deal with it anymore. I don't have sympathy for the people who constantly cheat and act a fool when their spouse's finally put their feet down and quit listening to all the excuses.

If you aren't married but keep sleeping with all the wrong people, well, there's a way to change that too. Quit going to bed with people so quickly (men, you too) and/or change the places you hang out to meet people. Picking guys up in the bar isn't the likely place to meet your future husband. Going home with the guy on the first night is not likely to let him believe you are even marriage material. But quit whining that you never seem to find the "right" person when your choices of where and how to get someone never changes.

Now, just so everyone reading this understands, I am guilty of both situations noted above. I've cheated and I've whined because I kept finding all the wrong guys and getting my heart broken. I was married and divorced and then remarried all before I turned 22. I won't go into details but just know that I am married to a man who doesn't put up with my crap. He loves me but he knows me. He knows my past and knows just how things work in my head and he doesn't put up with it. At the same time, though, he trusts me. He knows I've tried really hard to make changes and sees it every day.

Well, because I love my husband, I've changed some things about myself and been working on being a better me. I don't do it just for him, I do it for myself and our kids as well. If I keep making the same choices in my life to do all the things I did before, then I am just asking for the same bad things to happen. I'm still not the perfect wife, I still make mistakes, but after making a mistake I try my hardest not to make that same mistake again.

So, when I see people cheating on their spouse, getting caught and doing it again and getting caught and then the situation at home gets worse, I don't have sympathy for them. Not at all. If I am able to do things differently, anyone can. I've changed the people I talk to, hang out with and tried to only surround myself with people who are of good influence. That alone has been a change. I have people I call on when I feel over stressed or when things aren't going how I want them to, who don't let me take the easy ways out or take the road of a short fix. I call on them because I know they will remind of what a good man I have and will remind me of the problems I would cause if I made certain choices.

It's not the easiest thing because, at times, I don't want to hear certain things. I want my feelings to be validated and someone to tell me I'm right. Well, that was the first best choice I made. To not always go to those who will tell me what I want to hear, but tell me what I NEED to hear. It's not easy and I have to make the conscience decision to do the right thing but my marriage is WORTH every moment of it.

So, to those out there who make these bad choices and keep making them, sorry but don't come here looking for sympathy. If you want a good swift kick in the rear, I'm the right person to come to then. And don't come to me, or go to anyone for help, after the fact, I can't help you there. If you want help then GROW UP, reach out and call someone before you act a fool. You will gain more respect from everyone around you and you will prove your love to those you keep hurting. You will also prove that you are trying to be a better person and spouse by making that conscience decision to put other people's feelings before your own desires... Think about that.